JAIL HOUSE JOY by Paul Kennelly February 2009
Don’t forget your toothbrush , it’s really all you need
I’m taking you to Prison , these words you better heed
your gonna find it hard Son and you won’t find much joy
‘cos the guys your going in with, they just love a pretty boy
They’ll have you in the laundry , while heaving in the clothes
when they ask you, so politely, would you kindly touch your toes
they’ll get you in the library, as you put away the books
down amongst the fiction , they’ll have you for your looks
now, I don’t want to worry you or set you in a fright
but life could get real tedious, especially at night
some guys , they get impatient and they won’t wait there turn
just take it as it’s give to you these things you gotta learn
always sleep with one eye shut, the other open wide
in case a tall dark stranger wants to take you for his bride
don’t linger in the locker room or dawdle in the shower
as sure as God made apples , they’ll pluck you like a flower
the house of correction is where I’m headed to
the Judges direction , for me to start anew Chorus
but now, on reflection , I feel I gotta say
with this here erection, I’m bound the other way
well now Mister Po-lees-man , I’ve listened to your words
and all the things you told me, you can tell it to the birds
I aint got time for girlies , guys are more my scene
an am really looking forward , to be the prison Queen
I’ll be lounging in the laundry and tarting in the gym
I’ll be scrubbin’ in the shower block , letting everybody in
oh, I am so excited , even at the thought my new careers beginning , so it’s thankyou to the Court
and if your in no hurry , the wash rooms on the way
you can put the cuffs upon me and I will make your day
I like to keep my hand in , that’s if you understand
then off to the old slammer with my toothbrush in my hand
the state Penitentiary is waiting down the line
it’s quite evidentiary , I’ll have a lovely time Chorus
it’s so elementary , I’ll be a busy boy
it’s just fundamentry , my heart is full of joy
Don’t forget your toothbrush , it’s really all you need
I’m taking you to Prison , these words you better heed
your gonna find it hard Son and you won’t find much joy
‘cos the guys your going in with, they just love a pretty boy
They’ll have you in the laundry , while heaving in the clothes
when they ask you, so politely, would you kindly touch your toes
they’ll get you in the library, as you put away the books
down amongst the fiction , they’ll have you for your looks
now, I don’t want to worry you or set you in a fright
but life could get real tedious, especially at night
some guys , they get impatient and they won’t wait there turn
just take it as it’s give to you these things you gotta learn
always sleep with one eye shut, the other open wide
in case a tall dark stranger wants to take you for his bride
don’t linger in the locker room or dawdle in the shower
as sure as God made apples , they’ll pluck you like a flower
the house of correction is where I’m headed to
the Judges direction , for me to start anew Chorus
but now, on reflection , I feel I gotta say
with this here erection, I’m bound the other way
well now Mister Po-lees-man , I’ve listened to your words
and all the things you told me, you can tell it to the birds
I aint got time for girlies , guys are more my scene
an am really looking forward , to be the prison Queen
I’ll be lounging in the laundry and tarting in the gym
I’ll be scrubbin’ in the shower block , letting everybody in
oh, I am so excited , even at the thought my new careers beginning , so it’s thankyou to the Court
and if your in no hurry , the wash rooms on the way
you can put the cuffs upon me and I will make your day
I like to keep my hand in , that’s if you understand
then off to the old slammer with my toothbrush in my hand
the state Penitentiary is waiting down the line
it’s quite evidentiary , I’ll have a lovely time Chorus
it’s so elementary , I’ll be a busy boy
it’s just fundamentry , my heart is full of joy
